Demonstrate active listening by turning to face the person and making regular eye contact. Nod your head or make appropriate sounds to show you’re listening, such as “uh-huh. ” When the person is done talking, try to reflect back what he or she has said using emotion. For example, you might say “It sounds like you’re really angry about your performance on the test. ” At this point, simply let the person talk. Refrain from trying to “fix” the problem just yet.
It may be scary at first to open up and tell someone about a difficulty you faced. However, it’s important to note that sharing your story may help your friend see that everyone encounters hardships and that it’s entirely possible to succeed despite setbacks.
Keep in mind that your friend may not want your help. Instead of thinking in advance of how you will help, simply ask “Is there anything I can do?” and see what the person’s response is. If he or she wants help from you, let them make a specific request. That way you don’t put your foot in your mouth by coming off like you’re superior.
You can say something like “I know it sucks that you got an F in math. Luckily, you don’t have to worry about that in English. You’re the best student in that class!” Just make sure the compliment is true and the person knows you’re not just saying it to make them feel better. [2] X Research source
The spontaneity of taking an unexpected trip can help get the person’s mind off poor academics temporarily. This can also be a great way to shake up a boring routine and have a little fun. [4] X Research source
Browse YouTube for hilarious videos of animals or babies. Or, turn on your TV and watch a comedy. The point is to help your friend lighten the load for a bit and take some of the stress away.
Dancing can also offer a method of release. Your friend may be able to express anger, frustration, and disappointment more easily by channeling these emotions into body movements. [8] X Research source
You can also research some empowering motivational quotes to share with your friend for a push in a positive direction. For example, a famous proverb says “Just when the caterpillar thought the world was ending, he turned into a butterfly. ”[10] X Research source
For example, you could say, “I know that you don’t understand multiplying fractions right now, but I know that you’ll work extra hard to get a better grade on the next test!” Or, you can say something like, “I know that you’re not happy with this score, but it doesn’t mean that you are ‘dumb. ’ It just means that you didn’t understand this concept. "
Keep in mind that this goal should be realistic and attainable, not a stab in the dark. For instance, if your friend made an F on his or her report card, it would be unreasonable to strive to get an A by the end of the next grading period. Maybe the person can set a goal to bring the F up to a C or a B, which is more feasible.
Using a planner to write down assignments Assigning different colors to certain subject folders and notebooks to keep materials organized Aiming to complete projects at least a day or two prior to the deadline Keeping a consist daily and weekly schedule Stocking your backpack with everything you need to be productive Keeping your work area clutter-free and distraction-free Working for a period of time and then scheduling a short break (e. g. 30 minutes of work = 5-minute break) Creating a note-taking system Developing a reward system to inspire project completion
Your friend may also need to adopt the habit of speaking up in class and asking questions as the material is being taught. Practice at home with him or her raising his hand and asking a question to achieve a better understanding. Recommend that they go over their old tests with their teacher to narrow down which areas they don’t understand or which portions of problems they are getting stuck on. You could also suggest that they ask their teacher for extra tutoring.
