An effective alternative to numbing yourself is to work through your emotional pain by reframing it and focusing on more positive emotions. For example, you might want to numb yourself to an embarrassing incident that happened to you at work. However, maybe you can try to see that the incident is not humiliating, but rather quite funny. This is commonly known as cognitive reappraisal and, while not the same as emotional numbness, can produce a similar desired effect. [2] X Research source Be aware that feelings of total or long-term numbness might be an indication of mental health disorders such as post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)[3] X Trustworthy Source HelpGuide Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source or clinical depression. [4] X Research source If you feel constantly lost, numb, and hopeless, you should see your doctor or therapist as soon as possible.
If you get stressed out studying for tests the night before the exam, try studying for the exam two nights before instead. Then you can relax the night before the exam. If you hate going to parties because there are too many people, ask one or two close friends to attend it with you. Seek them out if you need to get away from the crowd and have a more private conversation.
Playing a video game Watching a movie Engaging in your favorite hobby Going to a concert or comedy show Exercising Counting down from 100 in increments of 7 Focusing on finding a color, such as blue, in your surroundings Noticing how your feet feel on the ground
Check email at work only–never at home Turn your phone off in the evenings Turn off social media notifications Take down your social media profiles Take a break from the internet during weekends
Maintaining a cool, deadpan expression Keeping your lips neutral, in neither a smile nor a frown Speaking in low tones at a low volume Remaining terse by keeping your sentences brief and to the point Maintaining eye contact with a calm, blank stare
What am I feeling in this moment? Am I feeling a single, overwhelming emotion, or a combination of emotions? Simply giving your emotions a label can help you view them more objectively. [9] X Trustworthy Source Harvard Business Review Online and print journal covering topics related to business management practices Go to source Why am I feeling this way? Are my emotions due to internal factors (such as my own fears) or external factors (such as when somebody yells at me)? Do I like the way I am feeling now? Perhaps you are feeling joyful or grateful about life and want to foster these emotions. But perhaps you are feeling anxious or nervous and do not want to experience these emotions in the future. What can I do to control my feelings in the future? Ask yourself if you can encourage your positive emotions while discouraging or even dismissing your negative ones. How can you structure your life so that you are the one controlling your emotions–not letting your emotions control you?
Focus on your future, not the present. Ask yourself whether your current failure has taught you any lessons about how you will react in the future. Pat yourself on the back for learning from a difficult situation. [11] X Research source Tell yourself that resilience only comes from failures. You cannot be emotionally strong right away: you will have to practice it slowly, over time. Look at this as one step on your journey to controlling your emotions. [12] X Research source Keep things in perspective. Remember that the person who cares the most about your emotional state is you. Your colleagues, fellow students, friends, and family members will soon forget if you had a minor outburst. Remember that this is not the end of the world: it is a small blip in your life. [13] X Research source
Pay particular attention to whether you think your emotional reaction is one that a mentally healthy person would share or whether your reaction is exaggerated somehow. [17] X Research source Be sure to ask yourself whether you have felt this way in the past. This will help you find a pattern in your emotional state. If something upsetting happens to you, tell yourself that you will simply write about it later in your diary. This will help prevent you from reacting emotionally in the moment.
You can also inhale for 4 seconds, hold for 4 seconds, exhale for 4 seconds, and hold for another 4 seconds. [20] X Expert Source Adam Dorsay, PsyDLicensed Psychologist & TEDx Speaker Expert Interview. 11 April 2019. You might also calm down by visualizing a safe place, like a hammock on a warm, sunny island, or thinking about a pet at home. [21] X Expert Source Adam Dorsay, PsyDLicensed Psychologist & TEDx Speaker Expert Interview. 11 April 2019.
Running or jogging Bicycling Swimming Team sports such as softball or soccer Martial arts Kickboxing Dancing
An important exception to this is if you require psychiatric medication for a mental health disorder. If this is the case, follow your doctor’s instructions at all times.
Avoid blue light, which is emitted by electronics, for at least 3 hours before bed[26] X Trustworthy Source Harvard Medical School Harvard Medical School’s Educational Site for the Public Go to source Keep your bedroom cool and well-ventilated Have a comfortable mattress Use a white noise machine to drown out ambient noise Avoid caffeine, alcohol, and heavy meals, especially in the evenings
The quality of your friendships matters more than the quantity. [28] X Expert Source Adam Dorsay, PsyDLicensed Psychologist & TEDx Speaker Expert Interview. 11 April 2019.
For example, if you are stressed out about an upcoming exam, don’t try to forget about it. Instead, tell yourself that you will study for 20 minutes a day: that will help you overcome your anxiety.
Things like psychotherapy, meditation, regular exercise, and regular time in the sun may help you manage your stress better. [32] X Expert Source Adam Dorsay, PsyDLicensed Psychologist & TEDx Speaker Expert Interview. 11 April 2019.
Just changing your environment for as little as 30 minutes can be helpful. For example, you could go outside. You will be especially relaxed if you engage in an activity that involves being social (such as getting a coffee with friends) or being outside (such as walking around a lake). These can be more effective than television at getting you calmed down and rejuvenated. [34] X Research source
Becoming emotionless, or out-of-touch with your emotions, can cause you to make bad decisions. [35] X Expert Source Adam Dorsay, PsyDLicensed Psychologist & TEDx Speaker Expert Interview. 11 April 2019.
