Free sites: PlentyofFish, OkCupid Tastebuds. fm (based on taste in music), PassionsNetwork, DateHookup, Mamba (Russian-based). Paid sites: Match. com, eHarmony, True. com, Lavalife, Lovestruck (UK, Hong Kong and Singapore), Zoosk, Meetic. If finding a partner who shares your religion is important to you, consider[2] X Research source : Christians: ChristianMingle, ChristianCafe, RainbowChristians (LGBT) Catholics: CatholicMatch Jews: JDate, SawYouAtSinai Mormons: LDSSingles, MormonDating, LDSplanet Muslims: Muslima, ShaadiConnections Buddhists: BuddhistConnect Seventh-day Adventists: Adventist Singles Connection Pagans: AonghusOg Hindus, Muslims, Buddhists, Sikhs, Jains and others: ShaadiConnections. Atheists: FreeThinkerMatch
Your username. Consider basing it in your initials, favorite number, or favorite hobby. Avoid using words like “hot,” “sexy,” “daddy,” or any sexualized descriptor in your username — most women will read it as creepy. Choose a good profile picture. Your profile picture should follow three rules: it should be recent, provide a good look at your face, and make you seem approachable. If you don’t currently have a photo that fits this description, take a new one! Bring along a camera next time you go to a social event, and ask a friend to take a quick snap of you. Avoid professional headshots. They’re too stilted for an online dating site, and you’ll look like you’re trying too hard. Your bio. Most websites will provide a short bio or “about me” section for you to fill in. Don’t write a novel, but do provide enough information that potential partners will feel like they’re gaining a sense of who you are. You can discuss your hobbies, your goals, what you look for in a relationship, any children you have, or whatever else defines you as a person. Resist the urge to vent about your previous relationship. “Recently divorced from a lying, cheating harlot” reads as “bitter and angry” instead of “dateable and balanced. " Your interests. Some sites will have a separate area for you to list interests or hobbies. Sports, musical genres or groups, crafts, historical periods, movie genres, types of food, travel destinations, and books are all appropriate topics for this part of your profile. Who you’re interested in meeting. Try not to be too restrictive on these parameters. You never know — your soulmate might only be a year or two older than the top age you specify. Keep your ranges broad, and remember that you’re not obligated to date everyone who contacts you. Be honest about what you’re looking for and what your intentions are. If you’re asked to describe in writing the type of girl you’d like to meet, this is the place to knock it out of the park. Don’t say “I just want someone to talk to” — no girl wants to be “just someone to talk to” when another man will call her a princess or the light of his life. Talk up your future partner in the best terms you can muster. For instance, you might try something like “I’m looking for the woman of my dreams, who will share my passion for cooking, cycling and honesty, and who will allow me to treat her like the queen she is. " Your contact settings. Some sites allow you to pick and choose who can see your profile or contact you. If you want to get a lot of responses, make sure it’s easy for people to message or email you.
Use correct grammar and spelling. Capitalize proper nouns and the beginning of sentences, and run your message through spell check first if you’re unsure. (Most word processors or email clients now have spell check if your browser does not. ) Make a polite introduction. If someone messages you, note that you were delighted to receive their message and give out a little more information about yourself. If you message someone, tell her more about yourself and express that you’d love to get to know her. Keep it elegant. Remember, if she wanted to meet a slouchy, rude, abrupt barfly, she would have gone to the bar. Instead, she came to the Internet to meet guys like you, so try to step it up a bit. Don’t ask what she’s wearing or what her figure is like, don’t push for pictures right away, and don’t ask for highly personal specifics at first (such as where she works or her full name). Instead, focus on her personal interests, her goals, and anything you share in common. Avoid being too aggressive or forward.
Let her talk about herself. Keep in mind that most people are comfortable talking about themselves, because it’s a topic they know well. Nervousness might tempt you to keep the conversation focused on yourself, but resist. A big part of being a good conversationalist is being a good listener. Ask her questions that are thought-provoking, but not too personal. Asking your potential ladylove what she does for fun on the weekends is perfectly fine; asking her if she’s divorced or had a hysterectomy is not. Though you might learn this information later, now is not the time. Keep your questions focused on things like what she does to relax, where she’s from, where she went to school, what kind of entertainment (books, music, movies, television) she likes, whether she’s an animal-lover, etc. Give her genuine compliments—but don’t comment on a sexual feature. Follow that old adage and steer clear of sex, politics, money and religion. (The obvious exception to this is discussing religion if you’re using a religious dating site. ) There’s a reason why these are forbidden topics when you’re first getting to know someone.
If you go on a date with someone you met online, take this a step further. Send her a tasteful, simple bouquet (that is, not two-dozen blood-red roses) the next day with a small note saying that you enjoyed her company. It’ll get more mileage than you might think.
For example, you could say “I’m sorry we didn’t connect, but I wish you all the best” or “Good luck finding who you’re looking for, and let me know if you ever change your mind. "
Allow her to let you know when she’s ready to meet. You can throw out a no-pressure signal like, “Just so you know, I’d be thrilled to take you on a date whenever you’re ready, but I’m willing to wait. When the time is right for you, let me know. "
