Stay off social media in case people are posting pictures of their gifts there. [1] X Expert Source Crista BeckDating Coach & Matchmaker Expert Interview. 26 August 2021.
For anxious perfectionists, shopping for the right gift can take a lot of time and effort. Your partner may have had to deal with an unexpected deadline at work and had to temporarily put everything else on hold. Just be sure to let them know how you feel if you’re disappointed. [2] X Research source
Some people feel obligated to say that they don’t want a gift when they actually expect one to avoid seeming shallow or greedy. If you expressed this, your significant other may have taken your words at face value. Work on communicating your desires more honestly. Your partner may have had a negative or traumatic experience associated with Valentine’s Day and may feel uncomfortable celebrating it. If you consider your relationship close, ask about what happened and if there’s anything you can do to help the healing process.
Some people are just very forgetful about dates. If your partner apologizes and offers to make it up to you soon, accept the offer gracefully. Others may be new to dating and are unsure about the gift-giving etiquette that surrounds the holiday. If you are more experienced, explain the unwritten rules to your significant other. This may be a good opportunity for you each to define how serious you think the relationship may be. [3] X Research source Your partner may be from another country and doesn’t even know what Valentine’s Day is. Many cultures celebrate Valentine’s Day in very different ways, and some don’t observe it at all. If that’s the case, simply explain to your significant other the importance of this holiday to you. Suggest to celebrate and exchange gifts on a certain day at least a week or two away. [4] X Research source
If you’re upset about a missed Valentine’s Day and your partner doesn’t appear concerned or apologetic, this can be a bad sign. This is especially true if your significant other even goes so far as to tease or admonish you for caring about the holiday. While Valentine’s Day may have become a marketing gimmick, you have every right to enjoy the holiday. When one partner invalidates another’s feelings, their relationship may be unhealthy. [5] X Research source
Be sure to use “I-statements” while discussing the subject. I-statements usually begin with “I feel” and go on to explain your emotions. In conflict resolution theory, I-statements allow you to express emotions caused by another’s actions (or inactions) without blame. An example I-statement for this situation would be: “I feel a little disappointed that I didn’t receive a Valentine’s Day gift from you this year. " Remember to reaffirm that you care about your partner. Be clear that while you may be disappointed, your relationship isn’t in jeopardy. [6] X Research source Don’t have this conversation while angry. If this experience has seriously upset you, calm yourself first by going for a walk or sleeping on it. [7] X Research source Tell your partner what kind of gifts you like. There is nothing wrong with asking for what you want, and it’s an important part of honest communication. [8] X Research source Some people have very particular tastes or don’t like receiving gifts. Don’t force your significant other to read your mind.
