For example, if your best friend of the opposite gender expresses interest in you, you may want to hang out with a group instead. Ways to pull back include not responding to their texts right away, not asking as many questions about their life, and seeming busy with other things.
For example, if you are at school and your unwanted crush asks you how your weekend was, say something like, “Great! How was yours?” rather than “Amazing! I went bowling, got a delicious dinner, and hung out with some friends. What were you up to?” This is still friendly and nice, but it doesn’t get too personal. Try not to send mixed messages—don’t hold the person’s hand or touch their shoulder playfully, for instance. Be sure to keep things platonic at all times so they know you only seem them as a friend. [3] X Expert Source Erika KaplanMatchmaker Expert Interview. 1 October 2020.
For example, if your unwanted crush wants to hug you before saying goodbye, make your exit before they get a chance to reach in for the embrace. Smile, wave goodbye, and walk away instead. While they may not mean any harm by their actions, it can still make you uncomfortable, and it’s okay to say something to make them stop. You can say something like, “Sorry, I like my personal space. ”
When they ask you to go on a date, say something like, “I’m not interested, but thanks for asking," or “No thank you, but I appreciate the offer. " If they ask for your phone number, say something along the lines of, “I don’t give out my personal line to coworkers,” or “Sorry, I only see you as a friend. "
For instance, ask your unwanted crush if you can talk in private, and say something along the lines of, “I feel like you may want something more than just friendship with me, and I feel awkward not saying anything. Sadly, I don’t have these feelings for you too. ” You can also say something like, “I’ve noticed you acting really flirty with me. To clear the air, I just want you to know I’m not interested in being more than friends with you. ” For a more subtle approach, you might say, “I’m really happy to have a friend like you in my life,” or “Thanks for being my friend. “[7] X Expert Source Erika KaplanMatchmaker Expert Interview. 1 October 2020.
Instead of joking around, try to diffuse the tension by talking about something else. For instance, if you are at work, mention how much work you have to do today. If you are at school, talk about the upcoming football game or big exam.
For example, you may use an excuse such as, “I’m not interested in going out right now,” or “I don’t date coworkers. ” While this can repel them, it may also give them false hope in thinking you may be interested down the line. They may respond with things like, “Maybe I’ll see how you feel in a few months instead,” or “Well, what if I got another job?”
For example, if your unwanted crush has a long frown on their face after you tell them you are not interested, say something like, “I’m sorry you are sad,” and move on. If you keep their hopes up, they will only feel worse as time goes on.
For example, when you are at school or work, say “hello” with a nice tone and go about your day. Alternatively, if your unwanted crush is someone you don’t want in your life, that’s perfectly fine. Do not talk to them anymore and keep to yourself instead.
