Ask yourself how likely it is that the pessimistic thought you’re having will come true. When you’re expecting the worst, consider all of the possible outcomes of a situation, not just the most negative ones. Then, you’ll see that there are many possibilities in virtually every situation. Try to combat each pessimistic thought you have with two realistic thoughts. For example, if you’re worried that everyone is laughing about your shoes, consider that 1) it’s unlikely that a pair of shoes will keep everyone laughing throughout the day, and 2) it’s more likely that a new, hilarious cat meme is making its way around the office messaging system.
Give yourself a designated “worry time. " Spend this time sitting down with your paranoid thoughts, evaluating them, and trying to minimize them. If a worry comes up during a different part of the day, just try to mentally move it to your “worry time. " Keep a journal that tracks your paranoid thoughts. Reread it weekly. This can help you not only unload some of your paranoid feelings in a more healthy fashion, but it can also help you see that some of your paranoid fears were completely unfounded when you read back over what you’ve written. You may see that you worried about X happening on a certain date. Once the date passes, and X didn’t happen, you may be able to accept that many of your paranoid beliefs are unwarranted.
If you tell your friend that you think your group of friends really hates you, your friend will be able to provide rational and concrete examples that prove you wrong. Just make sure you pick one of your more rational and even-keeled friends. You don’t want someone who might encourage your paranoid behavior and make you feel worse.
If you spend even a few hours a week pursuing something that you really love, whether it’s yoga or coin collecting, you’re guaranteed to be less absorbed in your paranoid thoughts.
Ask yourself what the chances are that all of the people you’re worried about are thinking about you as much as you’re worried about them thinking about you. Do you spend hours thinking about how much you don’t like those other people? Probably not.
If anxiety is in fact the main cause of your problems, then you may want to seek medical help or take actions to stop anxiety. [5] X Trustworthy Source National Institute of Mental Health Informational website from U. S. government focused on the understanding and treatment of mental illness. Go to source
Work on being less self-conscious. Self-conscious people worry about the subjective experiences of others, which is something no one really has control over. Recognize that no matter what someone thinks of you, they have the power to think it. Sometimes, other people make comments about us that reflect what we think of ourselves. Even in these situations, it doesn’t make the opinion a fact. Aim to shrug off these comments and stop questioning yourself every time someone states a subjective opinion of you. Work on accepting yourself unconditionally. [8] X Research source No matter if you did just trip over a rug or if your hair is sticking up, you’re still human. All human beings are flawed creatures. Embrace your natural quirks and quit thinking everyone else is perfect except for you. Need a reality check? Visit YouTube and watch a few klutzy videos to remind yourself that all humans make mistakes - and sometimes these mistakes are laughable.
The more time you spend socializing, the more comfortable you’ll be with the people around you and the less likely you’ll be to imagine that they all hate you.
When you’re feeling paranoid, review this list. Reminding yourself of all the concrete reasons why you should have more faith in others’ intentions can help you ease your paranoid thoughts.
If you’ve been given some hurtful criticism, remember that it is entirely up to you how to receive it. You can cry or dwell on it for weeks, or you can think of it as an opportunity to refine yourself. Write down the critical comment and ponder its validity. If there is even the slightest chance that the critical remark is warranted, then you need to think hard about whether this is an aspect of yourself you want to change, or whether you are willing to stay the same.
Remind yourself that it takes all kinds of people to make the world. Not everyone is going to be your best friend, but that also doesn’t mean everyone wants to be your worst enemy.
Be open and talk to your partner about it. Tell him or her that you know your feelings are irrational and that you want help dealing with them. Don’t accuse your partner of cheating or check in every two seconds when you’re not together to make sure he or she is not cheating. This will only make your partner feel like there’s a lack of trust in the relationship. Maintain your own identity. If you get too obsessed with the person you’re dating or start depending on him or her too much, then you’ll be even more likely to be paranoid because you’ll feel completely dependent on that person’s loyalty. Maintain other relationships outside of a romantic one.
Do your friends invite you to hang out? Send you text messages? Compliment you? Ask you for advice? If so, then why would you think that they completely hate you?
Help yourself feel better by making a list of all the great contributions you’ve made in the workplace. Make a list of all of the compliments or positive feedback that your boss has given you. Now, write down anything negative you were told. You’ll see that the positive far outweighs the negative, and, if they don’t make an action plan to shift your work efforts in a positive direction.
