Not only will practicing self-compassion help you feel more at peace, it will prevent your anxiety from snowballing further. [2] X Trustworthy Source American Academy of Family Physicians Organization devoted to improving the health of patients, families, and communities Go to source Self-compassion is particularly important if the event you are dwelling on is a mistake you made. Feeling guilt over your actions is distressing on its own: you don’t need to punish yourself further with the added anxiety of self-criticism over reliving the experience. If the event you are dwelling on is a recent difficulty, such as a breakup or the death of a loved one, acknowledge that a little bit of obsession is very normal, and that your obsessive thoughts will likely fade soon on their own. It’s often easier to judge a situation when we have distance. As an exercise, pretend you are speaking to a friend who is dwelling on the same event. What would you say to them?[3] X Trustworthy Source HelpGuide Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source
The 5-4-3-2-1 method is a useful technique for grounding yourself: identify 5 things from your immediate environment that you can see, 4 things you can feel, 3 things you can hear, 2 things you can smell, and 1 thing you can taste. [5] X Trustworthy Source University of Rochester Medical Center Leading academic medical center in the U. S. focused on clinical care and research Go to source Try to internalize the distinction between thoughts and facts. Question the obsessive scripts running through your mind by asking yourself if they’re objectively and definitely true.
Great activities to take your mind off your obsession include volunteering, joining a club, or learning a new skill. Not only will these activities distract you, they will increase your self-esteem. Finding a healthy distraction, like listening to a podcast or FaceTiming a friend, may help alleviate your obsessive thoughts since it forces your mind to think of other things as well. Keep in mind that distraction is a temporary solution: if the event you are obsessing over is serious, avoiding the situation can make things worse over time.
Plan your rumination period after you are finished working for the day, but not so close to bedtime that your obsessive thoughts end up keeping you awake. [7] X Trustworthy Source HelpGuide Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source When your obsession or a worry related to your obsession creeps up outside of your rumination time, simply write the thought down in your journal to be addressed during your rumination time. [8] X Research source
Maybe what happened was a mistake you made. Can you apologize to the offended party and forgive yourself? Maybe what happened was a mistake someone else made. Can you seek closure from the offender and work toward forgiving them? There is a difference between “ruminating” and “problem-solving. ”[10] X Trustworthy Source Harvard Business Review Online and print journal covering topics related to business management practices Go to source If you can’t improve your situation, acknowledge that your obsessive thoughts are not helpful.
To stop obsessing over a mistake you made, practice “self-indifference”: acknowledge the shame or embarrassment you are feeling, and then shrug it off. Everyone messes up sometimes. [12] X Research source As an exercise, humor your anxieties: what is the worst thing that could happen as a result of the event that occurred? Understanding how you would react to the worst-case scenario will help you stop obsessing. [13] X Research source
Practice reframing your negative thinking to make it positive: try to see the bad thing that happened as a chance to implement your values to make the situation better, or practice gratitude for the resources you have to help you through the situation. [15] X Trustworthy Source American Academy of Family Physicians Organization devoted to improving the health of patients, families, and communities Go to source
Make sure to meditate in an environment free of distractions (like your phone or television), and wear comfortable clothes. Try repeating positive affirmations while you meditate such as “I am calm,” “I am focused,” and “I am at peace. ”[18] X Trustworthy Source Mayo Clinic Educational website from one of the world’s leading hospitals Go to source When your obsessive thoughts intrude on your meditation time, acknowledge them, and let them go. [19] X Trustworthy Source Cleveland Clinic Educational website from one of the world’s leading hospitals Go to source Identifying your obsessions, rather than denying them, will help to reduce their power.
Try combining meditation and exercise by taking up a yoga or tai chi class. Yoga and tai chi’s focus on your breath and your body’s movements make these activities effective grounding techniques. [20] X Trustworthy Source HelpGuide Nonprofit organization dedicated to providing free, evidence-based mental health and wellness resources. Go to source
For example, if you are struggling with a breakup, a certain song might remind you of your ex. To avoid obsessing over the breakup, try avoiding the song for a while. Be specific: make a list (mental or physical) of things that might trigger your obsessive thinking in the future. Also keep track of things that may bring you relief when you are obsessing. Maybe a certain tea is particularly calming, or jogging helps to distract you.
A therapist will not only help you let go of your obsession; they will dig deep into your obsessive thoughts to get to the root of your anxieties. [23] X Trustworthy Source Harvard Medical School Harvard Medical School’s Educational Site for the Public Go to source If you are unable to access therapy in-person or if you prefer doing therapy from home, virtual sessions from BetterHelp may be a valuable option.