Consider if your interpretation of the joke is realistic and accurate. Are you basing your understanding of the joke on assumptions or first hand experience? Is your sensitivity based on previous experiences or a false sense of the intent of the joke teller? You may also consider if there is evidence to show that you should not take the joke seriously and can process your sensitivity in a way that is not angry or negative. Taking these questions into consideration may help you to realize that your sensitivity to the joke may not be warranted and your sensitivity may be based on other feelings or emotions that do not have anything to do with the joke.
Keep in mind laughter and joking around can be very effective stress relief, especially if you are struggling to maintain a positive outlook and are in a troubled or dark place. Though you may be in a mindset where everything is serious and dire, it’s important to allow yourself to lighten up and laugh, even if it’s at a silly joke.
You do not need to necessarily have first-hand experience with a certain perspective to find a joke offensive and inappropriate. Often, if you are feeling uncomfortable because the joke seems crude or inaccurate, you may be justified in taking the joke seriously and not laughing at it.
It can be useful to consider the joke as representative of the humor of the joke teller as well. A person who has a goofy sense of humor may tell a different joke than a person who is more dry and witty. Aligning yourself with the joke teller can allow you to take the joke as it is meant to be taken, which is often not seriously.
According to studies, we do not choose to laugh. Often, laughter is an automatic response that we do unconsciously. This is why it’s difficult to laugh on command or fake a laugh. Paying attention to how others are responding around may cause you to inadvertently laugh at a joke, rather than remain serious and standoffish.
For example, a coworker may tell a joke about his toddler always being sad when he leaves the house. You may then respond with a one liner about how your dog is always sad when you leave for the day. This is a funny response because it builds off of the original joke and presents a funny counter-image: your dog, sad at the door, as you head off to work. This will show you are not taking your coworker’s joke seriously and can be part of the fun.
Use self-deprecating humor whenever you feel awkward, on the spot, or unsure of what to say. For example, your friend may make a joke about how awful he is at a certain sport or game. You may respond with self-deprecation, like how awful you are at most things in general. This will likely cause your friend to laugh and allow you to respond to the original joke in a funny way.
You may want to look up some good jokes online and perform them in a mirror before you try them on others. You may also try out jokes on sympathetic friends before you tell them to a larger audience. It may also be fun to try an amateur comedy night at a local bar or pub and showcase your sense of humor to a room of sympathetic strangers. A good joke consists of a setup and punchline. The setup is the first half of the joke and usually contains the location and the key individuals. The punchline is usually one line and produces the laugh. For example, you may have the following set up: “A priest, a minister, and a rabbi walk into a bar. ” You may then have this punchline: “The bartender says: ‘What is this, some kind of joke?’”
When you are telling a joke or a story, you should try to be brief and to the point. Your audience has a limited attention span and you do not want them to lose interest in the story before you get to the punchline.
Note if you prefer certain styles of comedy over others, such as dark humor, dry humor, or slapstick humor. You may then be able to determine which jokes you may find funny in real life around your coworkers, friends, or family. If you respond to slapstick humor in film or television, you may respond well to it in your own life.
