You don’t always need to know exactly the right thing to say. Staying and listening, and offering consolation (like putting an arm around him or placing a hand on his shoulder) can mean a lot.
Underline the “men” in the word “menstruation. " If it says feminine hygiene, black out the word feminine. Have someone else do the shopping, if feminine packaging bothers him. [2] X Research source This way, the box can be fixed for him, or the supplies can be placed in a gender-neutral box, before he has to see it. Draw pictures of men on the boxes of hygiene products. Refer to his period with a masculine term, such as “menstruation” or “shark week. " Use gender-neutral language about menstruation (e. g. “menstrual hygiene” instead of “feminine hygiene”). Remind him that periods are difficult, and he’s a tough guy for getting through it.
Try learning about trans people in other parts of the world together. See if there is any media about trans men being on their periods. This can help normalize periods, and can demonstrate he’s not the only one going through this. There may also be handy tips included. Tumblr has a tag devoted to guys who menstruate. [3] X Research source
If he mentions taking off his binder, gently encourage him to do so. Binders can be tight and restrictive, and taking it off will help make his body feel more comfortable. Unfortunately, he may feel extra self-conscious with his binder off. Tell him that you think he’s handsome with or without it, and you support him taking it off whenever he needs to.
Warm drinks, such as hot chocolate, coffee, or tea, can help soothe period cramps.
Offer a heating pad if it’ll help his cramps. If he wants them, make sure he’s got a blanket and a warm drink.
Tell jokes. They can be really lousy jokes if you don’t know any good ones; sometimes the bad jokes are best to laugh at. Tell funny stories. Try something like “Remember the time that I spilt my coffee all over my trousers and it looked like I peed?”
Scarleteen has a gender-neutral guide to menstruation, which doesn’t assume the gender of the reader. [5] X Research source
Cramps: Chamomile tea, banana, avocado Bloating: Banana, avocado, beans, salmon Mood: Popcorn, salmon Fatigue: Dark chocolate Cravings: Anything high in calcium
Clenching, holding, and unclenching the muscles in his torso may help reduce cramping.
In the US, Planned Parenthood will prescribe hormones for trans people, even those who lack the resources for a psychological evaluation.
If he needs to convince his parents, try mentioning to them how moody he is on his period, and encourage him to let them see him being unhappy on his period. This may make them more willing to let him take birth control to stop or at least manage it. When talking to the doctor, focus on how menstruating harms him, especially at work or school. (Does he miss days? Is it painful? Does he suffer from serious mood changes?) This emphasizes why it’s important for him to get help. Some doctors want a person to take birth control 3 out of 4 weeks, to see if that will fix things. If this is only your option, do it. It will lighten his period. In a few months once his body has adjusted, come back and talk about any problems. For example, some people get terrible nausea at the beginning of the week when they stop the hormones, and thus need to take these pills all the time. The doctor visit might be very stressful for him. He’ll be afraid of the doctor saying no, and it may be necessary to misgender him for his own safety. It’s best if someone comes with to help. Afterwards, it may help for him to relax by spending time with a loved one and doing something peaceful, like watching a movie.
