Ask her if she wants to share how she feels. For instance, say “I know you are really hurt, I want you to know that I’m here to talk when you are ready. ” Do not force her to talk. Let her talk to you when she is ready. If appropriate, share how you feel. Say something positive, like “Although I feel really sad, we’re here for each other. ”[1] X Research source

Locate a mental health professional. See if your wife wants to talk to someone alone or with you. Use the internet or ask friends to find support groups for women who have suffered miscarriages. Find online resources to help your wife. You or your wife may be able to find great information on websites, blogs, or discussion forums about similar experiences others have gone through. Your OBGYN may be able to refer you to support services geared toward women who have suffered miscarriages. [2] X Research source

Make sure you continue to offer support and a shoulder to lean or cry on indefinitely. Just because your wife does not articulate that the miscarriage still bothers her, this does not mean it doesn’t. Realize that the emotional trauma of a miscarriage may persist for months or even years. Offer to run any errands she may have to do, unless she expresses that she wants to get out of the house. [3] X Research source

Suggest that she takes some of her stress out by running, walking or doing light weight training. Make sure she has doctor approval first. See that she is eating complete and well-balanced meals with protein, carbohydrates, and fruits and vegetables. Talk to her to make sure she has communicated with her doctor about her own physical condition. For instance, her doctor may counsel her about ways to avoid infection and what to expect in the days or weeks after the miscarriage. Remind her that most complications, like vaginal bleeding, abdominal pain, and breast discomfort should go away within a week. [4] X Research source

Don’t sidestep her grief by saying things like, “It’s a good thing it happened early in the pregnancy. " Don’t reinforce any blame she places on herself. Remind her it wasn’t her fault. Don’t make any false promises. Instead, role model hope and looking to the future with your own behavior.

Invite your wife on a date night. See if she wants to get dressed up and go to one of your favorite fancy places to eat. Invite her to lunch at her favorite outdoor bistro or café. Getting some sunlight and fresh air may help her move beyond her sadness. Make sure she’s ready emotionally to go into the world. Don’t force her unless she’s ready. [5] X Research source If she’s not up for going out, consider planning a date night at home. Prepare dinner and watch a movie, do a puzzle, or something else you can enjoy at home together.

Avoid activities where there might be young children, especially if you don’t have any children. Go to the movies with friends. Attend a festival, music event, or an art show. [6] X Research source

If you are a man, don’t be surprised if she wants to spend time with a girlfriend or her mother or sister instead. She may want support from other women right now. With your wife’s consent, invite people over to your home for coffee, wine, or conversation. See if your wife wants to invite her or your parents. Don’t invite friends or family over as a surprise – your wife may need alone time at first. [7] X Research source Again, remember that this may not be healing or appropriate for everyone. Think about who your wife is an individual and whether she seems to be invigorated by spending time with others or if she finds this draining.

Meditation Yoga Martial arts Breathing exercises

See if she can spend a few minutes each day writing her feelings. Encourage her to express her deepest emotions and true feelings in the journal. Let her know that you’ll never want to see her journal — you simply want her to use it for her own good.

Try coloring or online coloring apps. There are a lot of adult coloring apps available to download and use on a tablet.

Realize that you may not be able to cheer your wife up. Understand that grieving after a miscarriage takes time. Your wife may take days, weeks, or even months before she seems “normal. ” Your relationship might suffer, and it may not be your fault.

Find some time to quietly think about your loss. Talk to someone about it. While you wife may be able to support you, depending on the circumstance you may need to contact someone else so you can appear strong for your wife. Talk to your parents, sibling, or best friend about your loss. Contact a psychologist or counselor. They may have insight for you, and they may have insight or tactics you can use to better support your wife. Crying is okay. This is an event that has hurt you, too. [9] X Research source

Embrace the reality that you were not pregnant and did not carry the embryo, fetus, or baby with you. While your loss is true and deep, you are only experiencing a part of it. Avoid comments like “I know how you feel. ” While this may seem like a natural thing to say, she may see this as insensitive. After all, you’re different people with different roles in the pregnancy. Let her know that you may not understand how she feels. It may be helpful to articulate that you don’t know exactly how she feels. Say something like, “I feel this incredible loss, but I can’t even imagine how you feel right now. “[10] X Research source