Breathe deeply before you talk to her. Deep breaths help calm you down.
Unless you have spoken to her before, however, don’t use her name when you say “hello. ” She might find it creepy if you know her name but she doesn’t know you or yours, especially if you go to a big school. Don’t look up any information about her either because this can come across as stalker-like behavior. Only use her name if she has told you what it is.
You might also ask something like “can you let me borrow a pencil?” if you have a class with her, just make sure that you give the pencil back. Don’t do this too often. If you ask her to do things for you too often, she will begin to think that maybe you’re using her.
If you’re lucky, she may begin to rely on you when she has questions as well and then you can spark up conversations.
Pick your outfit out the night before and iron it so your clothes look neat. Maintain your hygiene. Shower regularly and wear deodorant. Brush your teeth and floss. Put on lotion and wear chapstick. Get haircuts regularly to maintain a sharp hairstyle. If you have long hair, wash it regularly and comb it to keep it neat. Wear cologne, but don’t overdo it. Most girls enjoy when boys smell nice.
For example, avoid saying things like “hey baby” or “nice butt” to her. She may think these comments are strange or offensive. Avoid using cheesy pickup lines or making comments about her body.
You are probably going to feel nervous to some extent. Accept it! Remember that she is just another person, do not put her on a pedestal or have any expectations when approaching her. Just be genuinely interested in what she has to say and let the conversation unfold as naturally as possible. Some ways that you can project confidence are to stand up straight and maintain eye contact with the girl. [8] X Research source
Speak slightly louder than you normally would if you have been told that you are soft spoken. [9] X Research source Don’t overtalk her, either. Confidence is not about being the loudest or speaking the most. It might be best to let her do most of the talking. Try coming up with a list of open-ended questions to get her talking about herself. These are questions that do not have a simple yes and no answer. They invite elaboration. For example, you could ask her, “What do you like to do for fun?” or “How was your day?” This will help to show that you are a good listener and you can learn more about her in the process.
Speaking to her when she is around a large group of friends could be risky unless you are friends with some of them. Try to talk to her when she is alone or only with one or two friends.
You can approach her and say something like “Hey, how’s your day going so far?”
For instance, maybe your teacher does something that is funny to you like using the word “irregardless. ” You could say something humorous like “I think it’s so funny how we have an English teacher who uses words that aren’t words!”
Talk about yourself some, as well, but don’t overdo it. You don’t want to dominate the conversation. You might say something like “I’m in the 7th grade, too” or “I got into college and I’m really excited about it. ” She will likely ask some questions about you, as well. Aim to talk slightly less than you listen. .
You might say something like “you’re really good at soccer” or “I saw you stick up for your friend to that bully. You’re a really nice friend, it seems. ”
She may be intimidated to sit with you if you sit with a lot of your guy friends, so tell her that you two can sit alone if she likes.
Ask her something like “I really have enjoyed talking to you. Can I have your number so I can call or text you sometime?” She may prefer to give you her social media information. You can talk to her that way, as well. Her parents may be strict and may not allow her to talk to boys. If so, be respectful. You can still talk to her at school.