Try to strike a good balance between preparing and being creepily prepared. Your crush likes getting the extra attention you want to give them, but they don’t want to feel like you’ve been thinking about them every single second for the past three days. That’s a bit creepy, even if it might be true!
Practice in the mirror. You’ll want to make sure you know what you’re going to say, but don’t make it sound rehearsed. Imagine a variety of situations in which you might have the opportunity to talk to your crush, and act these out in front of the mirror. The more prepared you are, the more confident you’ll be during the conversation itself. Have fun with it. Sure, try the serious versions of what you want to say, but also say it in a completely goofy way that makes you laugh. The less serious you take yourself, the more natural you will be when the time comes.
“I noticed those movies on your notebook. I’m all about movies from the ’80s. Do you have a favorite?” Hey, my friends and I were going to play some pickup after school. Maybe you’d want to join if you’re up for it?"
Look at your Facebook wall. Studies have found that simply looking at your Facebook wall for 3 minutes can significantly boost your self-confidence. [4] X Research source It’s worth a try!
What? you say. Why would I do that? I don’t even have control over it. You may not. But sometimes, we think about our crushes so much, and we imagine what life would be with them, that we start to develop unhealthy relationships with their imaginary selves. These imaginary relationships become so unhealthy that we can’t imagine ourselves being without this person, all without the other person even knowing. If you’re outcome-independent, your confidence grows. This is attractive to a lot of people. You don’t feel that getting rejected from any one girl or any one guy is a big deal, and so you shrug it off. Your confidence is bigger than the rejection of one person.
Go up to your crush during lunch time in the cafeteria. Ask them if you can sit next to them and begin to strike up a conversation. It’s often honestly as simple as that. Talk to your crush at a party. Whether it’s a birthday party or a pool party, if you’re both invited, you have an excuse to talk to them. Interact with them through one of your mutual friends. If you’re friends with one of their friends, go up to the friend and start talking, waiting for them to give you something to say.
Keep things casual and fun when you first talk to your crush. You don’t want to be too intense and risk coming on too strong. [7] X Expert Source Connell BarrettDating Coach Expert Interview. 24 September 2019.
Remember to try to avoid simple “yes” or “no” questions. If you ask your crush “Did you go to school in Canada?” they don’t have to give you a long answer. If you ask your crush “What was it like going to school in Canada?” they’ll talk a lot more. Ask them about their background. Where are they from, what do their parents do, how do they know so-and-so, etc. People, your crush included, love talking about themselves.
Eye-contact. Making and keeping eye-contact says that you’re interested in what the other person is saying. Face in their direction. Face your body in their direction. It means you’re interested in what they’re saying and aren’t shy. Smile. Smiling says the other person makes you happy. Flirt with body language. Gently bat your eyelashes, twirl your hair, or touch their shoulder. Laughing at their jokes. Even if the jokes aren’t that funny, smile and do your best to humor your crush.
One thing that can help you avoid cheesy pick-up lines and off-putting comments is to never say anything to a girl you just met that you wouldn’t say in front of your partner if you had one. [10] X Expert Source Connell BarrettDating Coach Expert Interview. 24 September 2019.
Once you’ve thought it through and you can tell they are interested in you, don’t worry about asking when you can see each other after this.
If there doesn’t appear to be anything distracting your crush and their annoyance with you still seems to be heightening, excuse yourself politely, make a quick escape, and consider trying another day.
There’s nothing worse than feeling unrequited love for someone who’s completely unaware of it, so if your crush friend-zones you, just accept it and move on.
