If she’s funny, notice what kind of jokes she makes. A nice person doesn’t hurt other people’s feelings to get laughs. [1] X Research source If she’s smart, see if she helps others, too. If she walks the person sitting next to her through a math problem, it’s a sign that she’s kind, too. [2] X Research source

If you don’t have any mutual friends, start by talking to her, but skip the pick-up lines. Just smile, greet her by name, and ask about something you both have in common. Group hangs are fun, but they aren’t the same as dates. Remember that you aren’t on a date unless both people know it’s a date. [4] X Research source

If a girl touches your arm or shoulder a lot, it’s a sign that she feels comfortable around you, which is a good sign. [5] X Research source If she initiates plans with you, such as asking to be conversation partners in Spanish class, that means she enjoys your company. [6] X Research source If conversation flows naturally when you’re together, you probably have both mutual interests and compatible communication styles. That’s also good news.

When you ask, say something simple and matter of fact, like “Can we trade numbers? I want to be the first to hear your opinions on the new Marvel movie. ”[7] X Research source If you’re working on a project together, this’ll be even more natural. Say “We’ll probably need to meet over the weekend to lay out the newspaper together. Can I text you?” You can also make this part of planning a group hang. Say “I’m stoked for the concert with you, Brian, and Jessica. Can I have your number so we can make sure we meet in the same place?”

Don’t just say “hi” or “hey. ” It sounds lazy, and she might not know what to say in response. [8] X Research source Use follow-up questions to show your interest. Ask her to tell you more about her quirky dance teacher, her semifinal softball game, or what it’s like to babysit her little brother. [9] X Research source

“Hi, what’s up? Is the math homework destroying you as badly as it’s destroying me?” looks a lot better than “hi whats ^ is the math hmwrk killing u 2. "

Make sure not to text after bedtime, which can feel invasive. Wind down the texts after 10 PM or so. [12] X Research source

Talk about pop culture you have in common. If you’re both giant Potterheads, ask how she feels about the new movie trailer. Joke about something in your daily life you both share. If the school lunch was an inedible casserole, ask if she’s having nightmares about it too. [14] X Research source

Avoid complimenting your crush’s physical characteristics, like her body or eyes, at this stage. It can come off as creepy. [17] X Research source If your crush has recently rocked a performance or other big event, congratulate her on her skills.

If you text your crush twice and she doesn’t respond, back off for a while. [19] X Research source If she’s into you, she’ll text you again when she’s ready. Don’t go too far in the other direction and never text her back. You may be trying to play it cool, but if she feels ignored, she’ll feel bad.

Consider that it’s often better to ask someone on a clearly-defined date. This way, you’re telling her that you like her and giving her an opportunity for an action plan. [20] X Research source

For example, you could say something like “I had fun with you tonight and enjoyed your company! Can’t wait to do it again. ”

Just like with compliments, mention something specific about her personality that you like. For example, tell her that she cracks you up whenever you hang out, or that her commitment to saving the environment is powerful and cool.

Suggest a specific date and time. This way, if she likes you but can’t make it, she’ll reschedule. If she’s not interested, it’ll be a lot easier on your feelings to hear “I’m sorry, I can’t make it” then “I don’t feel that way about you. ”[23] X Research source Plan the date around things you both like, like mini-golf and milkshakes. There’s no point in doing something neither of you like![24] X Research source