“I want to be more than friends. How would you feel about giving it a shot?” “I’ve had strong feelings for you for a long time. It feels good to get that off my chest. ” Before speaking to him, try flirting with or looking at your guy friend differently. He might sense you’re trying to shift things and react accordingly. Oftentimes, if a guy feels something romantic for you, you’ll know. [1] X Expert Source Cristina MoraraDating Coach Expert Interview. 29 September 2020.
Think carefully about the consequences of telling him you’re in love with him. Doing so can’t help but change the dynamics of your friendship, so if you’re sure you want to go ahead, do it carefully and slowly. [2] X Expert Source Cristina MoraraDating Coach Expert Interview. 29 September 2020.
Don’t make a big, dramatic spectacle of it by offering lavish gifts, yelling it out in public, or making a big sign with “I love you” written on it. Simplicity is best, so just tell him as calmly and directly as possible.
If he’s oblivious to your flirting or just super shy, try playfully asking “Have you ever imagined us together as more than just friends. . . ?” How he reacts will tell you everything. [4] X Expert Source Cristina MoraraDating Coach Expert Interview. 29 September 2020.
“Take some time to think about it. We’ve already been friends for a long time, so there’s no rush!” “I will understand if you don’t want to be in a relationship right now. I want you to do what’s best for you, and if that means staying your friend, then I’m fine with that. ” “I won’t be angry at you if you don’t feel the same way. I value your friendship, and that is more important to me than being your romantic partner. ”
It might be uncomfortable talking about difficult topics with your new partner if you haven’t talked about that stuff before. For example, you might not want to tell him that he hurt your feelings with something he said. However, successful relationships rely on good communication. [7] X Research source Be open and honest about your wants, needs, and problems, and ask that he does the same.
Even if you are hurt that he said “no,” try not to blow up at him and tell him what he’s missing. Don’t try to change his mind by attempting to persuade him to feel differently. This will make it harder to get back to your normal friendship, since he might feel like you don’t respect his feelings.
If you’re really having a hard time, talk to someone. Your parents, friends, teachers, and school counselors can all help you through this hard time.
This will look different for every friendship, so only you know what activities you like to do together. Some options include playing video games at your house, walking around the mall, or grabbing lunch or dessert. Remember that you don’t have to stay friends with him if it’s too painful for you. Focus on your other friends, family, goals, and interests while you distance yourself from him.
