Charm her with your wit. Make a witty observation that shows the girl your unique way of looking at the world. Make her laugh. Show her that you can be clever–even over-texting. Tell her something she hasn’t heard before. If you just heard an amazing piece of news that you know will make her jaw drop, share your knowledge.
Ask about her day or her week. If you knew she had an important event on the horizon, ask how it went. Make sure the question is something she can easily answer. Don’t ask about the meaning of life; ask the girl what she’s doing for the 4th of July. Keep it simple. Just one short sentence can communicate a large message. Keep it open-ended. Instead of asking, “What time did you get home from the concert last night?” say, “How was the concert last night?” This will give your girl more to work with. If you ask a question that can be answered in just one or two words, then you may be cutting off the conversation before it had a chance to start.
Take the time to actually use capitalization and apostrophes when you need to. Don’t go overboard and start using semi-colons and dashes all over your texts, but just give your texts the same quick scans you would give to an email before you send it.
Remember to relax. Don’t send her a long or feverish-sounding text message. Just one sentence at a time is just fine. Don’t try too hard to be funny. If being funny comes natural to you, great, but if you find yourself writing “hahaha” after your own sentences to show her that you’re making a joke, then you should take a step back. Remember that your girl is probably a little nervous too. This should make you feel better about conversing. Just be yourself, and don’t sweat over trying to say the perfect thing.
Find a common interest. Though you don’t have to talk about your political or religious beliefs while texting, you should find a common interest. Even if it’s just a TV show or a band, this will allow you to continue. Mention something you’re passionate about, such as soccer or even cooking pasta. This will catch her eye. Communicate that you’re willing to spend time on things that interest you. If you’re hanging out with friends or practicing with your band, tell her. She’ll be more interested in you if she knows you have a life. Show off your wit. If she says something funny, don’t just say “Ha ha” and end the conversation. Instead, say something funny back and show her that you can keep up.
Be playful. At the right time, show her your silly side by making a goofy comment. No woman likes a guy who takes himself too seriously. Tease her. If you know her well enough, tease her gently and wait for her to tease you back. Just make sure that she can pick up on your tone from the text and knows that you’re joking. Don’t be afraid to send the occasional “;-)” emoticon. Though you shouldn’t overuse these, a well-timed emoticon is a great way to flirt.
Show that you value her opinion. Ask her what she thinks about a certain subject, like a new movie that’s playing or a new restaurant that just opened-up. Ask her open-ended questions about herself. You shouldn’t get too personal, but if it comes up, ask what she’s up to or what she likes to do on the weekends. Show that you remember your conversations. If she told you that she had a big test coming up, impress her by sending her a “good luck” text the evening before.
Make sure there’s an equal flow of conversation. If you text her ten times for every one or two responses you get, it’s time to back off. Don’t text her the second you hear from her. If it takes her a day to get back to you, just chill. If you fire back a text five minutes after she finally responds you’ll seem overeager – and even desperate. Keep it cool, confident ,and comfortable. Avoid excessive emoticons. Though the occasional well-placed emoticon is a great way to flirt, don’t overdo it. Avoid crazy punctuation or capitalization.
If the girl is always the one to end the conversation, then maybe you should avoid texting her for a while until she initiates something herself. If the girl is only giving you one-word responses, she may be too busy or not just interested enough to chat with you. If the girl takes hours or even days to text you back, then maybe it’s time to take it easy. Respect the fact that she has her own life to deal with, and move on with your own. But don’t be upset, leave it in peace and remain positive. The opportunity to connect with her could be around the corner.
Tell her you hope she has fun with whatever she’s doing or wherever she’s going. Find a subtle way to let her know you’ll be thinking of her. Tell her “good morning” and “good night” at the appropriate times in the day (Of course avoid doing this too much at first, make sure the feelings are mutual. Otherwise you may come off as needy and/or annoying). Let her know where you’re going. Maybe she’ll take it as a hint that you would like to meet up with her.
You don’t have to be formal about it. You can just tell her that you’re going to a bar, restaurant, or concert with a few friends and ask if she and any of her friends want to come. If you’re having a long and detailed conversation, you can also just say, “I’d love to pick up this conversation in person. How about we keep talking over dinner or a drink?”. Boom, it’s a date.
