If you genuinely just want to make sure you copied her number correctly, you can show her or read it back aloud and ask her to confirm its accuracy. The exception, of course, is if she asks you to send her a text so she can log your number, too, or if she sends you a text first as a way of giving you her number. While there’s no firm rule about how long to wait before sending that first text, it’s usually a good idea to wait until the following day (or the evening of the same day if you got her number in morning / early afternoon and have long since parted ways). Any sooner makes you seem too eager, but any later makes her wonder if she’s anything more than an afterthought to you.
Use context clues from your first meeting to figure out if there are any abnormalities in her schedule. For instance, if she talked about being exhausted after switching to swing shift, you’ll know not to call her between 3 p. m. and 11 p. m. If you don’t know the details of her schedule, it’s usually safe to assume she has a standard schedule. Texting in the evening, from about 7 p. m. to 9 p. m. , will be a safe bet for your first text. You can pay attention to when she responds during subsequent texting and adjust your timing as needed.
While this is especially important when texting a girl you just met, it’s a good guideline to follow in the future, too. Texting should usually be reserved for short, lighthearted conversations; save lengthier topics of conversation for after you’ve gotten to know her better, and for phone or in-person chats.
On a similar note, avoid using too many acronyms and abbreviations. This can lead to misunderstanding and end your conversation if she doesn’t understand exactly what you’re trying to say. Spell out full words when you’re tempted to use acronyms, and use simple acronyms in moderation, such as ASAP.
Use emoticons only when you want to want to emphasize a certain emotion. Most people interpret an emoticon in the same way they would interpret the corresponding real-life facial expression, so emoticons can help you clarify that you’re happy, sad, or silly when making a certain remark. [4] X Research source On the other hand, a person’s facial expression doesn’t often change that much every millisecond–so if you litter a text message with a dozen different emoticons, you’ll come across as less sincere and potentially untrustworthy.
It’s not necessarily a bad thing if you end up starting most text conversations early on, but avoid doing so if she never replied back to a previous text that needed a response. Sending a second or third text if she hasn’t replied to your first can make you seem desperate. [5] X Research source
To start out, aim to be funny, sweet, or a little cheesy. A good flirtatious text to open with could be along the lines of, “You were so beautiful last night that I completely forgot my pickup line,"[6] X Research source or, “It’s too bad you left so earlier yesterday. I wanted to see way more of your beautiful smile. " Avoid sending anything rude or overtly sexual. Sending sexy messages and photos to this girl so soon can result in her feeling offended and blocking your number. Wait until you’ve spent more time together before sending texts of an intimate nature, and make sure she’s comfortable with it before sending her something she’d wish she could unsee.
Similarly, you could also continue a conversation you had when you met her. If she recommended a certain movie, for example, you might say something like, “I just watched (movie title) and see what you mean about the (plot/cinematography/characters). " You can then ask for her opinion about a specific part or detail, or ask if she’s seen a similar movie, to keep the conversation going and encourage a reply. [7] X Research source
For example, if she casually mentioned that she enjoys running at the local park, ask her how far she runs, or about her workout routine. As another example, if she only briefly mentioned that she works with kids, you could ask her what type of childcare work she does, if she enjoys it, and so on.
For this method, it’s best to skip the standard greeting and jump right into the topic, creating the impression that the thought just suddenly came to you. [8] X Research source As an example, you might ask something like, “Quick! Which is better: gelato or frozen custard? This is super important. . . "
Keep the tone of your initial meeting in mind when going this route, however. If you met under casual circumstances without a hint of romance in the air, or if she seemed hesitant about giving you her phone number, you might want to go easy on comments about seeing her in your dreams until after some trust and romantic context has been built in person.
Skip negative or demeaning jokes–even those about yourself–and opt for goofy one-liners built on things like puns and everyday observation. [11] X Research source For example, you could try something like, “I think the brain is the best, most fascinating organ. Then again, look what’s telling me that. “[12] X Research source
Getting a girl’s phone number can be exciting, but don’t get so caught up in that excitement that you forget the endgame. Use texting as a way to stay in touch and create a line of communication that will allow you to see her again.
This is especially true if you talked a lot when you met. In this instance, you might even start the conversation by directly asking to meet again: “I had a great time talking with you the other day. I’d love to meet up again – how’s next Saturday?” If you didn’t talk much when you met or wish to chat some before asking for a date, it’s fine to text back and forth a bit beforehand. You should still try to ask her out within a few days; otherwise, she might get the feeling that you’re weighing your options or uninterested.
For instance, if you met at a bar or social outing, there’s a decent chance that time slot is often open on her schedule. You could try asking her out during that same time slot the following week. If you were talking about a local sports team, ask her if she’d like to go to a game. If you met while volunteering, ask her to attend another event related to the same cause. If you met at a school assembly, ask her if she’d like to meet at the library for a study date.
Try to suggest an exact day and time for the date. If she says this doesn’t work for her, you could ask her if another time might be better–but let the matter drop for now if she says she isn’t sure. Similarly, don’t get rude if she rejects the date completely. It’s possible that she simply doesn’t have any free time right now; rudeness will ruin your chances at getting a date when she does. Even if she really is brushing you off, though, it’s her loss–skip the guilt trip and simply shake off the rejection.
You can still use texting to confirm the details of your date later on if you wish to have a written record of the time and place.
