An increased life span Lower rates of depression and distress Greater resistance to the common cold Better mental and physical well-being Better coping skills during times of stress A more natural ability to form relationships and cement bonds
Your journal can take on any form that you like. If you don’t care to write long-winded reflective paragraphs, you can just make a list of the five most prevalent negative thoughts and positive thoughts you had that day. Be sure to give yourself the time and opportunity to evaluate and reflect on the information in the journal. If you write every day, you may want to reflect at the end of every week.
An example of an automatic negative thought is, upon hearing that you have an upcoming test, you think, “I’ll probably fail it. ” The thought is automatic because it’s your initial reaction to hearing about the test.
One way to challenge negative thoughts is to be objective. Write down the negative thought and think about how you would respond if someone else said the thought to you. It’s likely that you could offer an objective rebuttal to someone else’s negativity, even if you find it difficult to do for yourself. [6] X Research source For example, you may have the negative thought, “I always fail tests. ” It is unlikely that you would still be in school if you always fail tests. Go back through your files or grades and find tests that you received a passing grade on; these challenge the negative thought. You may even find that you have tests that you passed with As and Bs, which would further confirm that your negativity is exaggerated.
For example, if you have the thought, “I will probably fail the test,” stop yourself. You’ve already identified the thought as negative and evaluated its accuracy. Now try replacing it with a positive thought. A positive thought doesn’t have to be blindly optimistic, such as “I will definitely get a 100 on the test, even if I don’t study. ” It can be something as simple as, “I am going to take time to study and prepare so I do as well on the test as I can. ” Use the power of questions. When you ask your brain a question, it tends to find the answer for you. If you ask yourself, “Why is life so terrible?” your brain will try to answer your question. The same is true if you ask yourself, “How did I get to be so lucky?”. Ask yourself questions which draw your focus onto positive thoughts.
To avoid this type of thinking, embrace the shades of gray in life. Instead of thinking in terms of two outcomes (one positive and one negative), make a list of all of the outcomes in between to see that things aren’t as dire as they seem. For example, if you have a test coming up and don’t feel comfortable with the subject matter, you may be tempted to not take the test or to not study for it at all, so if you fail, it’s because you didn’t even try. However, this is ignoring the fact that you’re likely to do better if you spend more time preparing for the test. You should also avoid thinking that the only outcomes of your test-taking are an A or an F. There is a lot of “gray area” between the A and the F.
Someone who is personalizing may think, “Betty didn’t smile at me this morning. I must have done something to upset her. " However, it’s more likely that Betty was just having a bad day, and her mood had nothing to do with you.
For example, you may take a test and receive a C, along with feedback from your teacher saying that your performance improved greatly from the last test. Filtering can cause you to only think negatively about the C and ignore the fact that you have shown improvement and growth.
For example, you might think that you’re going to fail an exam you’ve been studying for. A catastrophizer will then extend that insecurity to assume that you’ll then fail the class and have to drop out of college, then end up unemployed and on welfare. If you’re realistic about negative outcomes, you’ll realize that even if you were to fail a test, it’s unlikely that you would necessarily fail the course, and you would not have to drop out of college.
If your workplace has an outdoor area with benches or picnic tables, schedule yourself a little down time to be outside and refresh yourself. If you are unable to physically visit an outdoor peaceful place, try meditating and visiting a pleasant outdoor area with perfect weather in your mind. [13] X Research source
Consider taking up meditation as a way to center yourself and learn excellent focus. By meditating every day for 10 to 20 minutes at a time that’s convenient for you, you can increase your awareness of self and the present, helping you to corral the stinking thinking with greater consciousness. [19] X Research source Try taking a yoga class. Yoga can also help you become more aware of the world as you get in touch with your breathing. [20] X Research source Even just stopping to take deep breaths and rest your mind for a few moments can make you feel happier.
Take a class to learn about something you’ve never done before: consider pottery, painting, mixed-media collage, poetry, or wood working. [23] X Research source Try learning a new craft such as knitting, crocheting, sewing, or needlepoint. Craft stores and online tutorials are great resources for beginners who do not want to take a class. Doodle or draw in a sketchbook every day. Try revisiting older drawings and turning them into something new. Be a creative writer. Try penning a poem, short story, or even try your hand at a novel. You can even perform your poetry at an open mic night. Try role-playing, dressing as your favorite TV or comic book character, or trying out for a part at a community theatre. [24] X Research source
Avoid people who sap your energy and motivation. If you can’t avoid them, or don’t want to, learn how not to let them get you down and keep your connection with them brief. [26] X Research source Avoid dating anyone with a negative outlook. If you’re already prone to negative thinking, you’ll be falling into a trap. If you do wind up in a relationship with someone who struggles to think positively, though, seeking counseling together might be your best option.
Working towards achieving your goals—even if you’re just taking small steps—can make you feel happier. [28] X Research source
Always make time for laughter. Hang out with friends who make you laugh, go to a comedy club, or watch a funny movie. It’ll be hard to think negatively when your funny bone is being tickled.
