It’s also important to remember that, in the long run, telling the truth is easier than lying. Keeping a complex web of lies straight in your head can be incredibly stressful - just one slip of the tongue may ruin you. In the famous words of Mark Twain, “If you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything. " Express your feelings as they come up in the relationship. For instance, if you’re feeling super happy in the relationship, let her know! Likewise, if your need for quality time together isn’t being met, let her know that, too. [3] X Expert Source Jessica January Behr, PsyDLicensed Clinical Psychologist Expert Interview. 12 August 2021.
There are, however, certain types of disagreements you should take seriously - namely, disagreements about the parameters of your relationship. For instance, if you see your relationship as an exclusive, long-term commitment but your girlfriend is looking for something much more low-key, this is something you’ll need to seriously discuss before your relationship can progress. You should also consider how your actions would effect you in reverse, ex . if She went to a guys house at 2 or 3 AM, would you be jealous?
It may seem cynical to purposefully pick things that your girlfriend says to repeat later. Try to adopt a positive outlook when you do this - think of this as making an effort to show you value your partner’s thoughts rather than scoring easy points down the road.
Talk about the level of communication she’d like when you two aren’t together. For instance, she might like you to check in on her often, or she might prefer that you don’t text her super often. [8] X Expert Source Jessica January Behr, PsyDLicensed Clinical Psychologist Expert Interview. 12 August 2021.
Talk about the level of communication she’d like when you two aren’t together. For instance, she might like you to check in on her often, or she might prefer that you don’t text her super often. [8] X Expert Source Jessica January Behr, PsyDLicensed Clinical Psychologist Expert Interview. 12 August 2021.
It’s important to respect your girlfriend’s independence by taking her wishes in this area to heart. Don’t insist upon opening car doors for her, pulling out her chair, and so on, if she doesn’t like it or it makes her uncomfortable. This can create tremendous awkwardness in the long term. A real gentleman knows that actual respect is far more important than archaic displays of etiquette. [9] X Research source
Consider the reverse of the scenario above - would you want someone to kiss you if you knew that you didn’t want him or her to? Of course not. Putting yourself in your partner’s shoes like this can help you understand how actions that might seem minor to you can be very big deals to others.
Paradoxically, this can also mean being fearless about expressing your inner fears. You can (and should) occasionally talk to your girlfriend about deep-seated sources of worry - for instance, your performance at school or work, stressful relationships with your parents, and so on.
Be sure to contact your girlfriend on your own - don’t just respond to her calls and texts. Taking the initiative to make that crucial first contact with your girlfriend demonstrates that you want her as much as she wants you.
This being said, a good girlfriend will never willingly ask you to do things that are bad for your financial health. Though the mythical “gold-digger” is much rarer in real life than popular culture may lead you to believe, beware of women that pressure you into buying expensive gifts.
Sometimes this may mean being truthful about negative emotions that, for whatever reason, you can’t express during your daily life. Be honest and open about these emotions - they’re part of the real you - but don’t let them become the only topic of conversation in your relationship.
For example, if you know your girlfriend is comfortable with a little sappiness in your expressions of verbal affection, rather than saying, “Hey, nice dress”, you might say, “I like your dress. It reminds me of that dress you wore when we first met. " This is much sweeter and has the added benefit of showing that you remember a small deal from early in your relationship.
One great date idea is to surprise your girlfriend by taking her to do an activity that she’s casually expressed an interest in during conversation. For instance, if she’s previously talked about how cool she thinks aquatic animals are, you might consider taking her to a SCUBA diving class. Similarly, if she loves art, you might want take her on a hike into some scenic woods with an easel and paint to make your own together.
Be sure to turn off your phone, pager, laptop, and/or any other distracting devices. Nothing ruins a great moment like having to take a business call in the middle of your candlelit dinner.
If your girlfriend insists that she should pay or that you should split the bill, you may want to put up a token resistance to show that you’re genuine, but don’t seriously fight her on the issue. Some women can feel patronized if their man constantly pays for them while they’re out together, so show that you value her as an equal partner in your relationship by allowing her to pay.
The best, sweetest way to tell your girlfriend that she’s important to you is almost always to just be completely frank about it. Flowery, elegant language is no substitute for genuine emotion - almost all girlfriends will be able to tell when you’re being yourself and when you’re not.
